my husband left me because he was unhappy

Married 3 with a baby, also 3. !.Good By.I am trying to be happy but its not working.I dont know how a person could ever feel more lonely and empty and unhappy.Im trying.. Over those years the contempt, spite, and hate the false sense that everyone but her was living a great life constantly grasping at some new external source of happiness but never satisfied. That I am dead to him. These are really dated terms. What city and state are you in? I hope u can sort your situation so you are not left rearing the kids by yourself. We started dating young and it was really a fairytale relationship. And even worse, they ruin their own happiness in the process by doing things that destroy everything that makes them happy. A year ago I found out he had cheated on me and me wanting to be a good wife and loving him with all I am I took him back and worked on what he said made him do it. He was determined. My husband did the same thing to me. She came back after months and said wow you have changed! I wonder if he's OK. I have been on his plan for 21 years. It's pathetic, but true. We are happy to provide resources, but please know that our site is not meant to be a substitute for professional mental health or relationship help. But wow now three months of this has gone by and it only gets worse. I fell deeply and it was the hardest six months of my life. I have remained respectful and kind throughout while going in the car to have my meltdowns. My heart goes out to you and I wrote this in hopes to give you faith that just as well as evil there is still good. Im SO GLAD I am off that (not so) Merry go round come roller coaster rides through dark depressive rides in and out of sadness. me & my bf were 2gether 8 years & i found a conversation on his tablet telling a girl he loves her & all this stuff.. i was willing 2 work it out but he told me he hasnt been happy 4 the past year & hes not in love with me anymore & hes bored.. i was devastated, a total wreck.. he moved 2 PA with his family while he waits 4 the girl 2 move there in April.. we still text as friends but it gets really hard as I cant talk about his new gf.. i am far from over it but i do want 2 be his friend, possibly more if we can work it out.. after he left i started taking care of myself & all that pampering stuff.. well, i came 2 the conclusion that i dont want his a** back.. she can keep him, i hope they will be very happy.. im done.. he left him crying & pleading, left me.. i was faithful 8 years, i adored him, worshipped the ground he walked on.. i work, i just got a truck, im sweet as candy & i deserve better.. we keep texting as friends & sometimes we still flirt a bit but its not like that.. he played Me, the best thing that ever happened 2 him & im slowly getting over it.. i know im great & i deserve greatness so whatever dude.. ur loss.. This may help resolve the issue. How can I make myself feel better and sleep better? He said he left because of lack of communication and the fact that I wasnt listening to him about his health. If you want to. He is a sociopath who researched, calculated and executed a horrific crime on another human being with no remorse, empathy, compassion and humanity!! I realised then this was serious and we were in trouble. Its safe to say its probably in the bloodline, and Ive got great role models there. My virginity was stolen from me raped at the age of 14 by 2 people I thought were my friends. Hating him will only make it harder for you to move on with your life and put this marriage in the past where it belongs. Christy, you just summed up my life since December. She walked out about a week ago and she always leaves and never tells me what I have done wrong and she never tried to work through things. She really screwed you. They had lunch once a month. All he has said, via text, is that im an awful person who talks down to him which is not true. We even looked at engagement rings. I am 28.after 5 year of marriage my wife left me.our relationship was role model in the society.I had just started to earn the best salary which could be enough for our happy future but she has left me and I think there is value of the money.she was satisfied with every angle including sexual too.but suddenly she changed decision and staying with her parents.cant believe. Then quite quickly our arguments started becoming more fatal & terminal. When I came back to get rental I found hidden inside a mint bottle Vicodin and soma pills that were in two sets of boxes. U keep trying to figure out what happened but he just wont work together andsats he doesnt want me anymore but doesnt say why. Im so sad and heartbroken and feel like I gave him my heart for nothing, wasted 26 years of my life. to do the same. Because he worked full time he told me that from Monday to Friday he was unavailable and so I was alone doing it all . I know this awful feeling so well. Its been almost 2 years and for the last 3 days Im an emotional wreck, this shouldnt hurt this much this far along. I have spoke with him hundreds of times about sticking together when problems would arise with the girls. You knew I would beg at your feet. I am truly sorry to hear that this happened to you. Im trying to take it one day at s time but the anxiety is tough I keep ruminating and worrying about the future.i just keep telling myself for now its hard but Ive got to keep it together for my kids, Hi I finally waited by the locker and he finally came to the locker 4 hours. Living is not living unless you are truly living, being respected and happy. He created us & gave us a plan to follow (bible). I borrowed the money for the lawyer from somebody else.he paid all the bills. The ability to do what they want and when they want. I believe it is due to her sickness as we were two peas in a pod for the last 19 years. It sounds like the only way this will work is if you tell her what you want and deserve and if she cannot do that then get busy. Last medically reviewed on October 20, 2022. It is so hard I know.. but Im living proof that you can and will trust again if you allow yourself to believe. If you loved me he wouldnt of left me. He was asking for her number then the conversation ended. Let him know you are very serious and you have reached your breaking point. He is going back to his daddys at 30 years old because he will have no responsibility. But, the remarkable thing that I want to share, pertinent to this discussion, and the particular issue of people who just *wont/cant* get over a particularly traumatic breakup/abandonment is this: AS A BY-PRODUCT OF THE SUCCESS OF THE NEURONTIN ON MY PHYSICAL PAIN, THE OTHER THING THAT AMAZINGLY DISAPPEARED, WAS THE PAIN AND OBSESSION OF THAT THIRTY-YEAR TORCH I WAS CARRYING. Im just a hopeless Romantic i guess that loved my wife unconditionally. When when I questioned her parenting style (her first sonmy stepson grew up to be a narcacistic bully), she came back the next week, having already been to a divorce attorney and had already filed. I felt like I was wasting his time. We drifted apart, the excitement, the compassion and love faded away to nothing. I can barely sleep I usually try to find places to go to get my mind off things. Unlike bipolar or schizophrenia, a personality disorder is NOT a chemical imbalance! Thank you for sharing. Words of advice Get an emotional tool belt, of things that will help you get better.. One thing we never were was abusive to each other but this morning in particular she punched me in the face out of anger. Sometimes all it takes is to know someone believes in you to find the strength. Hey there. Her mum deals mostly with the kids from her side whilst she meets with her new guy spending weekends in hotels having great sex (apparently) whilst I am truly the single parent thinking about her having the great sex. She tried to abduct our son from daycare and it only didnt happen because my daycare worker knew of my wifes history and that Im more of the primary caregiver because of her instability. And the holidays are almost here, I know Im not going to feel better by then, so that has me down also since Ill be all alone for the first time through that. You may never get the answer you are looking for from your partner, but there are several common reasons why someone leaves a relationship. Same situation, married 18 years, 2 girls.not sure if she had somebody else, but I have a feeling,,,wont talk to me at all. Its so sad that 6 minths after he one-sidedly decided that OUR marriage was over, we are already divorced. At the time, my husband was working 14-18 hours a day just to keep food on the table. I married my husband less then one year ago. Please help I feel like Im drowning and dont know how to protect my kids from the pain they will feel, I feel horrible for you, this is going to be a very hard time but youre going to have to focus on the kids. All 3 girls are Daddys girls. That stayed off the booze with your love and support then started to lie and drink because theyre bipolar. Im not sure where that fell short, like I said maybe its because I didnt fluff his feathers every minute, telling him how wonderful he was every minute of every day. She wont answer my calls or anything again. Im so confused and conflicted. I was sick but it didnt matter. As woman we must always trust our gut, I wish I had so many times. We have always had a strong relationship, but I lost my job and she was just about to start college, I got another job with the government and was doing that while she was in school, yes because of this situation we did get behind finiancally . My husband of 10yrs left me, said he didnt live me anymore. Just pity those who fall for his charm in believing in him its only a matter of time before they will find how false he is . Emotionless and distant. I did it all. The important thing here is that you find someone who can make you feel good again. I never wanted any sort of separation or break. This other guys life probably seems fresh and new, problem free, sexually attentive and like a vacation from her life. we were happyhappy for 2 years. How about being married to a Sociopath who hid his traits before marriage and afterwards used emotional, verbal and physical abuse to control you, who isolated you from family and gave nothing while taking everything. This often happens when one partner is keener to end a relationship than the other. There had been so many years apart and having four children between the two of us makes moving forward difficult to say the least. For his mothers birthday I baked and cooked all night and day. When my wife announced that she was leaving, I felt like I had been punched in the gut. I dont want to hear oh hes a jerk for leaving or he probably found someone else. Im sad, I want him back more than anything else in my life, so right now I cant think past hoping my phone rings, that he emails me, comes back to me..cause truth is, he probably isnt and I dont want to deal and dont know how to deal with that. I got his phone and looked for her name. He would never compromise nit even come home 1 time a week to have supper as a family hes a workaholic Now hes not happy because Ivehad anger issues so I went to get help since I too realizes I have to work on myself and I changed.my kids see it.however apparently I didnt change enough. He apologized but, i know that he meant it. I am devastated, cant eat, have a pain inside me, dont want anyone to know and have always thought we would be together forever. I want to be his wife and be with him always and he just left. Dont fall for it ! We have more information about what to do in a crisis at https://www.goodtherapy.org/in-crisis.html, I have been married for 6 1/2 years and now i want to leave my husband. 2015 he wanted to return but i was afraid to living together so i left him out there. But most of the time do not want to come home. 6. My partner of 7 years left after an argument over nothing 3 months ago and he is refusing to talk about anything. Thank you for your response! There are other ways of finding things out, but that all depends on which boundaries you are willing to cross. I asked him why is he doing this and all he can say was that he hasnt been happy. Its so hard because I love him and I am trying my best to keep my family together. Things have been bad for awhile, but it is still hard to accept that it is over. Well then I would follow up at the dirt cheap stores where she was getting this butane from and I was able to get identification that she was still purchasing this stuff. I didnt understand it at all l would always tell him if you want to be with other people please jut let me know l do not wish to be a part of that. And you cant necessary believe everything she says. I think youre right. I dont know what to do, pls I desperately need help. Seriously, scared me. We both came from dust and we shall return to dust. Anyway, I know it takes time. I feel broken, rejected, and unloved. No way! I cry everyday and have been in bed with no desire to do anything. I rather struggle financially for awhile then live in a horrible marriage. We have 3 girls 10.11 and 13. the first time they ever met face to face was at the airport.love at first sight in her words.the way I found out, I was on my way to work and got a text message. I just dont want to give up because I feel like she is my other half I feel like she is the only one for me.. Also found a stack of dram idol vyles under bathroom sink. I work full time and take care of everything in the house. I found out last Friday (after him denying it over and over) that he is having an affair. Some women ruin their lives because they feel so heartbroken over the loss of their husbands. If you have to question them or yourself 9 times out of 10 there is a good reason for this. Wow that sounds horrible, cant believe after all those years its almost like they could erase everything you thought they were fighting for for nothing. My husband of 32 years has just announced that he never loved me and is moving out. While he may have chosen to leave because he felt unhappy, unfulfilled, or whatever else, you mustn't start believing that you're somehow responsible for his choices. I knew it was something . Is this forum legitimate? I have kept in touch with her help her financially and tried my hardest to help the situation between the kids and her all to no avail . Oh well, f$%# her! Their loss. Im so sorry to read this (and other) stories. She went off to Arizona to stay with friends and get away from me. Hi.im married to my husband forfor 4 years.i made more money than him.I stuck by him through his madness.Drinking and drugging.He never went for help.I always felt he was doing what he wanted because he just wanted to.I cared for him too much.I let my guard down.He now has a better job and only four months being employed,he says we have nothing in common, we should be friends.He not used to anything.Now he gets another chance of living a better life, hes gone.All he did was lie to me . thanks for this im in this kind of situation right now.. On new years eve my fiance left thee house. Im totally breaking my heart, I never thought this would ever happen hes the best thing that ever happened to me. Now grab that bull by its horns and take a stand!!! Our two oldest sons, fifteen and nineteen are going to live with him. Professional help is available and should be sought. 5 years ago I started to discover and figure out that my wife was a substance abuser,drug addict with prescription meds, narssasis, pathological liar. My husband left me because he was unhappy in our (mostly) sexless marriage. That we argue all the time and that things werent gona change. And thats not bad advice either, but self-help books are incredibly helpful for getting over your pain. Ive been there and now Im free from his affairs. I cannot tell you how many exs I have that say they never believed I would ever leave. Ive lost my best friend, majority of custody of my daughter, my family home, my values and my wife. Had to move out of my house as his business is next door. Marriage values need to be seriously overhauled in this country or lets just start raising our kids to be cheaters and narcissists because thats what everybodys becoming anyway. I hope you can continue to be strong and take the steps to be in control. My husband left me on 10-14-15, after 2years of being married says he found the person he had been looking for since he been in Florida, what I dont understand is why marry someone if you were looking for someone else??? Moffa, now 76, had been married 52 years, and . Any youths on how to cope welcome. We cannot figure her out this is so unlike her. So youre probably right, 19 years from -now 21 for me, we probably will never know. I wish I could take the pain away!I cant bear the thought this might take years to get over. They do not except criticism and will always turn it around on you to the extent they will talk your friends and family in to believing how crazy YOU are and how he/ she could never make you happy. Im devastated. Husband walked out a week before thanksgiving on our three kids and me.

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